The Making of M.O.M.

I just feel emotionally drained. Several things have attributed to this, none of them being things that I really have any control over.

First, MckMama's (Jennifer's) sweet baby Stellan is back and forth and back and forth from okay to bad, okay to bad. It's exhausting for me to watch it unfold, yet I feel so drawn, so called to pray moment by moment.

Second, my kids have been TERRIBLE today. I'm sure my uptightness isn't helping, but Lucas cried, almost non-stop for 2.5 hours this morning. I was attempting to do some school work with Elizabeth. I was so excited about schooling this morning because on Saturday I bought 2 workbooks at the dollar store, 1 for Lucas and 1 for Ashlee and I just knew they's be so thrilled to have "big kid" work to do. They could have cared less. Lucas sat in front of his workbook and screamed most of the morning.

Ashlee was in a terrible mood and had to be spanked several times, which is totally unlike her. And, during all of that Elizabeth is frustrated because she cannot read. It was more than I could take and I surely questioned why in the world I'd ever want to do this homeschooling thing on a regular basis.

Lastly, another situation has me completely riddled with anxiety. Hopefully, I will be able to share more with you about that later.

All that to say that today has been one of the most stressful days I've had in a very, very, very long time. And, I'm not handling it well, at all. I've lost my cool, yelled at my kids, said BAD BAD things in my mind (and maybe even some of it slipped out), and just been on the brink of tears all day long.

Surely tomorrow will be better. It HAS to be better.

Please God, hear my cries, resolve these areas of unrest. Heal sweet Stellan's heart and make my own be one that carries with it peace, rest and abiding joy.

Special Time - n. (spe-shul time) - the act of Mommy and Daddy spending quality time with one of the "big kids" doing whatever the big kid wants to do.

Lucas' special time was, by far, the most interesting special time I've ever experienced with our children. On Saturday afternoon, I had purchased some flower bulbs and seeds at the dollar store. I just knew Lucas would want to play in the dirt and plant all the flowers in our very detestable flower bed.

No such luck.

Instead, Lucas' special time was all about being 150% boy.

You see, a few weeks ago it was Ashlee's turn for special time. What did Ashlee want to do? Bake a cake. There was no convincing her otherwise. So, we baked a cake.

But OH NO! Lucas wanted to have nothing to do with planting or baking or cleaning or such. Instead, he wanted to play "Fireman" which eventually evolved into the funniest, and probably most testosterone filled, evening I've had in a long, long time....er, ever (at least for the testosteroney part).

Warning: The quality of these pictures are TERRIBLE. Namely because a certain 9 month old, who shall remain nameless, pulled our camera off of the bar and now the LCD screen does not work. And, I suck at correctly focusing pictures with the viewfinder in low lighting (which you will see why such lighting was necessary in just a second).

Anyway, our evening began with Lucas wanting to play "Fireman." Very quickly that turned into "hunting" which then evolved into 2 make-up wearing RAMBO men fighting for their lives. I knew I would eventually use that Clinque "Cherry Apple Red" lipstick for something.

Taking aim

Mean faces

After both boys had their sights aligned and their shooting techniques perfected, they went on a hunting expedition.

Strategically placed throughout the house were "enemies" that they had to find and destroy. Such enemies could look sweet and cuddly, but don't let their costumes fool you.

This is a flesh eating polar bear. There used to be a person sitting in that chair. Luckily, my protectors stalked and killed him before he had a chance to sink his flesh ripping teeth into any of us.

Because of the fierceness of the "enemies" these boys had to perfect their army crawling. As you can see, perfection is in the eye of the beholder, er...crawler.

Lucas got smart and hitched a ride on the back of his wingman.

Then, they proceeded to obliterated all enemies. There was a brief moment of turmoil, which ended in Lucas saving Luke's life from Tigger the mean leopard (yes, we know he's tiger, but my kids are addicted to Tarzan right now). He still reminds Luke, as he gently pats underneath his father's chin,

"I swafed your wife dad."

To which Luke responds,

"Yes son, I know."

At the end of their hunting adventure was a prize kill of Vance the Dog. Apparently, underneath that pile-o-dog is a smell that makes grown men snarl. Lucas is obviously oblivious to the stank of fresh kill since he's such an avid hunter.

Our evening was capped off with the ultimate man food: Hot Wings. Naturally present was the ever constant staple of our dinner diet: Mac & Cheese.

So, if you're almost 3 year old son ever requests a "Princess Party" for his 3rd birthday, rest assured that it's nothing that a little fried meat, gun fire and fresh kill can't cure.

I'm still trying to figure out who had the best time, Luke or Lucas.

Yet, it's so hard to really be considered tough when you have a porcelain princess pig peeking over your shoulder.