The Making of M.O.M.

I really shouldn't even be making time to post this today, but since about 2 days ago it's been on my mind and every time I get on Facebook it flies all over me again.

I try not to make it public (blog) knowledge that I have a facebook account. Mainly because I don't want creepers trying to find out information that I don't want the general public to know by stalking me on FB. But, I just don't think I can sit in silence about this anymore. Maybe some of you will call me rigid or stupid or a religious "holier than thou" church lady.

Frankly, I don't care.

Last year, apparently for October being Breast Cancer Awareness month, I got several messages in my FB inbox asking me to post the color of my bra as my status. I wasn't suppose to say it was the color of my bra, but rather just say the color.

I chose to opt out of that little FB game since my purpose of having FB is to keep in contact with friends and to share about my family, not to air my dirty laundry. Literally.

But this year's "game" I cannot choose to just ignore, especially given that last year I saw several men posting their reactions to the bra game after they realized what was going on.

This year's Breast Cancer Awareness game, again for women only (because the point in these games is to keep men in the dark and make them wonder), is to state where you keep your purse/pocketbook. Except you don't just state the location you also say, "I like it..." in front of the said location. So, now statuses are popping up everywhere such as, "I like it on the table" or "I like it in the closet" or "I like it on my dresser."

I cannot see how as women, who are followers of Jesus, we can simply add this to our status without a second thought. Colossians 3 clearly says that we are to set our minds on things that are above not on things that are on Earth. How can we, as Jesus following women, post such things for men to see, to entice them even, and believe that we are setting our own minds, or even encouraging our fellow men, to focus on what is above?

I know my husband is extremely visual. The protection of our marriage through him focusing his eyes, ears and mind on things that edify our marriage is one of his priorities. Men think about sex, far more than we women do (well, most of us). All men are visual. I'd take a guess that most men who are lovers of Jesus struggle with lust, pornography and other sexual addictions at some point in their life.

Why o why would we women of faith choose to tempt our brothers and fellow believers with such talk?

I just can't justify it. I know, for certain, that I'd not like my husband reading the status' of my friends and where' they'd "like it." So why would I do the same for another woman's husband or fiance or brother who's marriage may already be in jeopardy over such things?

I won't. And I hope that you'll reconsider this yourself as well when you receive offers to play this "game." Truly, meddling in the mind of a married man is not a game I choose to be a participant of.

Unless it's my own man. Then, game on. ;)

Finally, I'd really like for someone to explain to me how this raises awareness for Breast Cancer. I'm ALL FOR finding a cure for one of the leading killers of women but I just fail to see the connection here. Anyone care to enlighten me?

As Elizabeth is seemingly growing up right in front of my eyes, day by day, minute by minute. I'm finding it harder and harder to determine where to draw my line in the proverbial sand. My greatest desire is that she would grow to be a woman who loves the Lord with all her heart, soul, mind and strength. But until she is grown, I know that it is our job, as her parents, to guide and direct her, keeping her under our wing until the proper time.

Lately, my biggest struggle is knowing there are certain aspects of her life where she is ready for me to let go and not be involved in every detail. This firstborn baby of mine can tie her shoes, bathe herself, pick out her own outfits and no longer needs me to help her explain to others what she's trying to say. She is developing friendships that are outside of mine and Luke's circle of friends. Before, all of her friends were the children of our friends. But now, she's established friendships with other kids in her Sunday School class, great kids, but we aren't necessarily great friends with their family.

It's fine line that I'm finding myself walking. The line of knowing when she's big enough to do things I've always done for her and the line of realizing that she's still so little in so many ways. And the part that I think overwhelms me the most about this line I'm walking is knowing this is only the beginning.

My heart both rejoices and grieves these new milestones. I soar with pride as I watch my oldest daughter help a younger sibling just because she wants to. I love watching her tote Olivia around on her hip and "mother" Ella when she casually passes her by. My heart wants to burst when I hear of her making good choices even when we are not around. I take pride in the young girl that she is when I see her encourage a friend on the soccer field. I delight in her heart for the Lord when she shares, without hesitation, just what Jesus means to her. And I'm overwhelmed with the lady she's growing into when she comes to me and takes ownership of a mistake she's made.

Yet I grieve the loss of knowing that with each new step she needs me less and less. She's moving from small child into a big kid with her own thoughts, hobbies, relationships and desires that are separate from mine. She requires less and less of me for her physical needs and our role is shifting into an area where my focus for her is more on her spiritual and mental development rather than just feeding her, redirecting her and making sure she's clean.

And even though I'm thrilled with this new role I find myself in, where I'm less responsible for doing things for her in the day to day, my heart continues to throb over the loss of the days that I know are already gone and the ways that she will never need me to help her again. From here forward it's a dance I will have to learn as I go, knowing when to step in and instruct and when to let her learn for herself, sometimes even watching her fall.

I'm realizing more than ever just what a blessing it is to parent a child who does not rely on you for their every, single physical need. It's a bittersweet moment of holding on and letting go. Yes, I know 6 years old is young and she will still need me for many more years. But I'm getting a sampling of what's to come. A taste of what it looks likes to be a mother to someone who is their own person and no longer just and extension of yourself. I love watching her do things at her own pace, in her own style and with her own processes. I get the hugest thrill out of seeing her create something from her very own mind.

But I'm still learning to walk the line between her being totally dependent on me and allowing her to go and do without me being her security. It's a fine line I'm finding myself walking and I'm so blessed that God has given me this sweet gift. Because truly there's no other line I'd rather walk.